hogyan főzzünk erőszakosan (vagy részegen): a legjobb youtube gasztroműsorok #1
A tepsit a legszerencsétlenebb haverod arcával kell kivajazni, a szalonnazsír karmája az, hogy üdítőitalt gyártsanak belőle disznószemű meszkalinideges kanadaiak, az univerzum leggyakoribb alkotóeleme nem a sötét energia és nem is a hidrogén, hanem a fodrozott szélű lapszalonna, amit kosaras mozdulatokkal kell a bevásárlókosárba félpályáról, a krumplit nem késsel kell hámozni, hanem foggal vagy ötnapos borostával, a svéd hagyma pedig annyira chucknorris, hogy nem felvágni kell, hanem ráugrik magától a pengére. a.k.a. Hogyan főzzünk erőszakosan vagy nagyon, nagyon részegen?
Majestic 12-szintű nemzetközi titkot gyártottunk abból a főzővideóból, amiben bemutatjuk A Másik Sráccal, Akinek Nincsen Emésztőrendszere, hogy hogyan kell kanálnyi Naga Sabi Bombbal nyáloszlopszobrot ondolálni az univerzumba, de már érezzük az ihletet arra, hogy mi is főzőshowt csináljunk YouTubera, ha már sikerült olyan gyöngyszemekre ráakadnunk, mint a Regular Ordinary Swedish Meal Time vagy az Epic Mealtime - mindkettőhöz kell egy Bob, akinek a súlypontja a torkában van, alatta meg egy csak egy szőrös, vaskos, eres dührengeteg két kézzel és kontinenstől függően egy kés (ezek a svédek) vagy egy üveg Jack Daniels (ők meg Kanada).
REGULAR ORDINARY SWEDISH MEAL TIME (youtube/swedishmealtime)
Őket csak azért engedjük előre, mert így még nem láttunk embert főzni, pedig egy ideig azt hittük, hogy a gasztrohisztérikus nevetést Bede Róbertnél tökéletesítettük, aki már attól meg tudna maga áldani egy komplett papi kongregációt, hogy harminc forinttal drágább sertészsírt vehet a műsporban, amit jókedvből főz, mert más képessége már nincs hozzá. A Regular Ordinary Swedish Meal Time csoportja nem jókedvből főz, hanem igazi berzerker dühből, úgyhogy ott nem csak foggal hámoznak krumplit, hanem ököllel puhítják a keverendőt, lendületből fejelik a húsgombócot és víz helyett havat tesznek fel a tűzhelyre. És ez csak, no pun intended, a jéghegy csúcsa.
EPIC MEALTIME (youtube/epicmealtime)
Hozzájuk képest az Epic Mealtime klinikai precizitással, brutalitással és mesteri vágóképekkel játszik: a kanadai sokasfogat minden nagyban és felszorzott kalóriákkal tervez és valósít meg: a meatballhoz való húst láncfűrésszel szeletelik, a karácsonyi töltött pulyka helyett bird in a bird in a bird in a bird in a bird in a pig van, szusit gyártanak fast foodból és szerintük minden étel egyetlen igazi alkotóeleme a bacon, a másik meg az alkohol, de olyannyira, hogy Jack Danielses-sörös palacsintától kell csodálatraméltóan erőszakosra bekúrni korareggel. (És ivókupát is csak szalonnából szabad gyártani, másból BLASZFÉMIA.)
Ez most nagyon folytköv.
♫ shapeshifter, the #mondaymusic experience
Shapeshifter (sometimes referred to as New Zealand Shapeshifter) are a live Drum & Bass[1] act from New Zealand. They have been heralded as a musical phenomenon for their ground breaking live shows and unique blend of heavy soul with drum and bass. Their reputation as pioneers of modern music was built by a unique approach to electronic music which had previously been restricted to computer-based studio musicians and has earned them widespread critical and commercial acclaim. (via wikipedia)
planetdamage.com: newsflash, february 2011 - gong hei fat choi!
Hello, new readers and residents. I am Damage, gonzo journalist, catalyst and an explorer of weird and futurologistic. The looming year of the Metal Rabbit finds me in a night debatable in more than one way: taking a break from reviewing Made in DNA's Twitter-bred sexpunk novel BUKKAKE BRAWL, I am wading knee deep in Icelandic sadness caused by Fennesz, an apparent demi-god in postmodern drone noise, surrounded by a fourhundredful of the most eyebrow-raising indietronic artsy hipster crowd in the bowels of A38 and I'm only leaving for a tactical break to return to my crew to tell them I have brought back suburban chöd bullet in a sudden flash of inspiration only caused by vat-grown drug monkeys, kitchen work based in anguish or a heartfelt tactical break in the loo. It makes them scatter along seven axes of misery and a rush of disintellect.
For you who have only strayed in from the rain: I come from another planet where boredom is unheard of and fuckery is plentiful. I'm behind Hungary's greatest alternative community portal (then let it sink), worked on the script of the multiple-award winning and New York Times-acclaimed comedy Nyócker (which was let sink by others), spearheaded the alternative touristic magazine The Dose (it is still floating) and I've just finished correcting all the midterm exams of my students at the International Business School where I taught them social media and some advanced skills in how to ROCK more. Hopefully these students are drowning themselves in vodka or anything else that's not vodka but behaves a LOT like it. Now I'm working on a book on the general weirdness of pop culture fueled by the quest for the real truth, how reality can be hacked and what's the greatest ROCK ever done on stage or in the studio. If you have anything or anyone to share to make this book finish faster (including yourself or your soul), don't hesitate to put your hands up. The rush is necessary, the book will need to be finished in the year of the Metal Rabbit. And there's an AR game in the pipeline. On a different note: I literally had a zeitgeist breakdown 48 hours ago. I know now what happens to you when it turns out that whatever you believed to be true and real breaks down. The feeling of a veve physically twisting your brain is one of the strangest things that can happen to you in your life. Apart from.. well, a few other things.
On a much kinder note: this newsflash is kindly supported by 109Jewellery whose gift to us in the first days of 2011 gave the Wheel of Fortune a very definite spin. Go buy their stuff. And while we're at it: the clenching of throats and shitstorm is finally over. Breathe now. This year will be better. Do what Dylan Moran suggested: stuff your mouth with chocolate and then go and masturbate with both hands. Or find someone to do it for you. Anyway. Gong Hei Fat Choi! (Below, a Jessica Rabbit impersonation by none other than the beautiful Bianca Beauchamp.)
deus ex: meet adam jensen
I still don't know what to say about the new Deus Ex: the possibility of acting out a sentient and walking implant inventory is certainly a treat. The outdoor scenes look amazing. When it comes to the small details is the moment when Deus Ex crumbles back to the previous decade with all its surfaces, textures and animations. I certainly do understand how games are made, I worked in the game industry as well - it's just.. cyberpunk - whatever it is now or whatever it becomes - needs to be more grittier, detail-filled and alive to make an impact. This is too sterile. Anyway - take a look at this, as kindly recommended by Riplakoidase, from the vast fields of Kotaku.
♫ echo lake - young silence (yes, the music video done with kinect)
This video was shot on the Microsoft Kinect by me and Dom Jones on December 14th 2010. I then spent the next seven weeks (mostly after work) making it look like that ^
The video was captured and processed using custom applications developed in Cinder. The software was based on the work that Flight 404 did with his early Kinect libraries. (eat echo lake here)
symmetry online workshop (no maths needed)
The KNK101 workshop introduces the elementary study of symmetry ( known as ‘group theory’) to an audience with no background in mathematics. This field of mathematics has very little to do with numbers, instead – it studies transformation and movement of abstract structures. The applications of group theory range from simple permutation puzzles and military or monetary cryptography to particle physics and general relativity, making it the central conceptual framework of our age.
The workshop is spread over 6 weeks ( or three fortnights ) and the details for registration are here. [ tldr: just drop me a mail at fadebox/gmail. The fee is $50 (international) and the equivalent Rs 2400 for India. Please hurry!] (fadereu.posterous.com, via technoccult)
the rules of the suicide girls fight club
1. You don't talk about fight club.
2. You don't talk about fight club.
3. When someone says stop, or goes limp, even if he's just faking it, the fight is over.
4. Only two guys to a fight.
5. One fight at a time.
6. They fight without shirts or shoes.
7. The fights go on as long as they have to.
8. If this is your first night at fight club, you have to fight. (The SG Fight Club Missy Gallery, via @toyclouds)
bastards: the film
The 10-15 minute film is nightmarish vision, and a dark tale of a fictional and threatening future. This mentally multi-layered scheme was preceeded by a two year collaboration between the players in research, consultation, and in writing the screenplay. The main character of Diogenides is played by Péter T. Zselensky, who in real life is confined to a wheelchair. The screenplay makes use of several events that have occurred in his life. The film combines several realistic events with certain surreal scenes to create an indivisible whole.
Got to know about Bastards, a mystic experimental short movie via a long-time reader of this site, Zsellerm, whose mail about the engimatic circumstances and people behind the movie only make the production more intriguing. And looking at the teasers (and you can find more on the Youtube profile of director Tzafetaas) you will regret about no further word being out about this movie. Dug this up from the bookmark list and I'm promising you to get more info about this ASAP. Until that, spread this like wildfire!
The film is a nightmarish story. Maximilian is a human monster who creates monsters in his own image. Maximilian needs a heart. He orders his creatures to find one. Diogenides, a philosopher hermit, lives his life in a wretched little house, confined to a wheelchair. Old, dilapidated furniture, a decrepid television, and an ancient computer. The internet is his only connection to the outside world. One night he cannot find any of his friends online on the usual social sites. After a long search, he comes across an unusual profile. A bald man, photographed from behind. Suddenly he turns around. His face is covered by a mask. His look, the mask, and the uniform-like clothes, all create fear. It looks like he is alone, but he is not. Two cyborgs in a nuclear bunker. They look almost identical. They are Maximilian’s footmen, the Cleaners. The creatures of Diogenides and Max find each other, and begin to chat. The Cleaners locate the philosopher using hi-tech machines. They set out to get his heart while keeping him busy chatting. They arrive and start to work. The Cleaners destroy the realistic world of Diogenides, plunder his mental and physical values, and then leave.
It is finished.
mini-documentary about brazilian tattoo artist maneko
On how to enjoy life and how to respect what you have. Brilliant. Thanks to 13th Unit for bringing this to the world. (via boingboing)
michael caine doesn't blink for nine and a half hours
Actors, self-appointed brain hackers, NLP wannabes, manipulator master course failers and all the rest of you new scum - get this right via the love of Richard Metzger's Dangerous Minds. The Michael Caine blinking meme gets an update, this time the charmeur of ROCK can withhold his eye muscles for nine and a half hours. Because as we all know, blinking weakens us. But if we don't blink and just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going and if we don't blink and we just keep on going, this will eventually make people listen to you. Or go away. Or establish you as the weirdest fuck on the block. Or will leave you with all the prestige of a holy man. Mind you, this is the perfect technique to use when handling your most bureaucratic administrative rounds. Below, there's the original one.
the conet project: letölthető hidegháborús államtitkok (yes, downloadable numbers station broadcasts)
Hidegháborús államtitkokat, matahariktól és vérszökőkutaktól lucskos kémtörténeteket és a Fringe idevágó epizódja óta összeesküvés-elméleteket kombinálnak össze a The Conet Project gerinckarmolgatóan hangulatos felvételei: a rövidhullámú rádiózás értői és avatottjai csak number stationként ismerik azokat az adásokat, amelyeken kizárólag rövid zenei vagy dallambetétekkel központozott számsorokat hallhatunk. A berlini fal leomlása előtt, úgy hírlik, még ilyen, csak one-time padekkel visszafejthető kódsorok formájában kapták a kémek és titkosügynökök utasításaikat - a számállomások viszont a mai napig működnek. Töretlenül. Az Irdial az elmúlt húsz év felvételeiből tallózott négy korongnyi mintát, amiket itt tudtok letölteni (meg számos más helyen is, legálisan, pl. az archive.org-on), a negyedik CD-n még magyar nyelvű (NNN/V18) samplet is hallhattok, a helyetekben rákeverném a NASA hangfelvételeit a Jupiter mellől, mellé pár véletlenszerű tracket a Vir Unis - Carbon Based Lifeforms - Z'ev háromszögből, aztán várhatjátok a démonokat. Kellemes hétfőt. Amúgy.
Messages of creepiness and unearthliness crawling through the realm of shortwave a.k.a. number stations. If you're a Fringe fan, you've probably already dug your way into one of the weirdest one-way communication methods of the past century, weird radio broadcasts carrying seemingly endless lists of numbers read in monotonous voices. Now Irdial's offering you (actually they've been offering this to you for quite a while, here's also a download link at archive.org) a number station broadcast compilation spanning 4 CDs from the past twenty years and it's nothing short of weird. Put it into your mix, spice it up with the NASA Jupiter recordings (just as we did), add some Vir Unis, Carbon Based Lifeforms and Z'ev tracks on top and then expect the worst. A great Monday to you, by the way.
♫ jogger - nephicide
Debut video for Jogger’s Nephicide. Jogger is Jonathan Larroquette and Amir Yaghmai. Based out of LA, they know how to put that shit together. (via alepisaball and coilhouse)
light rhapsody
"Light Rhapsody" is a real time human lighting sculpture. A 3D model has been projected in real time over the real model through a projecting device. It creates a radiant dissemination emanating from her skin.That projection was animated and progress over her entire body until it has reached and invaded her face. (light rhapsody vimeo, as recommended by @toyclouds, thx!, and also found on paranoias.)
the damage report 009: életed leghosszabb stringje
Már csak azért is szórakoztató az az olvasói levél, hogy túl hosszú mondatokat írok, mert még emlékszem egyetem harmadévről a szomorúan férjezett, leszbikus angoltanárnőre, aki ugyanezt mondta, weird vocabulary, outlandish grammar, ezekkel a szavakkal, utána írtam neki az Üvöltő Szelekről egy ötoldalas félévi esszét. Tőmondatokban. Szerinte életem legjobb írása volt, szerintem ujjazzon magának gyereket holnapig. Leegyszerűsítem: nincs túl hosszú mondat.
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mad moxxi cosplay
Meagan VanBurkleo, who we've seen before as the Princess of Persia, returns to wow us again with a day spent as Mad Moxxi, a maniacal star of Gearbox's shooter Borderlands. (as gorgeously illustrated by meagan vanburkleo, via kotaku)
patrick kalyn's somnolence (full HD short movie)
Synopsis: By 2031, the Earth has exhausted its supply of fossil fuels. With the world on the verge of collapse, nations from around the globe form a coalition called AREN; the 'Manhattan Project' of clean self-replenishing energy. When an experiment goes wrong that threatens the world's existence, David Canterra and a team of elite soldiers are sent on a mission to stop the anomaly. What they find is a mind-bending alternate dimension, and their only way home is through the fabric of time. (via cpc)
mike mitchell: katamari damacy meets warhammer 40k
Mike Mitchell created an excellent Katamari Damacy themed illustration "Prince Of Darkness" for Gallery 1988's "Multiplayer" show. (mike mitchell's store, via kotaku)
how to make music without instruments?
This is an example, how to use the basic stuff in your room in such creative and musician way. Just take some noisy and voiced objects and record them with any sampler. At the end use all this stuff to create any music u desire. Or... You even don't need any sampler. Just use your friends, give them gadgets and transform your party into gizmo-jam-session. I can guarantee much fun. Enjoy! (via vimeo)
beyond black mesa: the complete short movie
Beyond Black Mesa is a short Independent fan film Inspired by the Half-Life Video Game series. This is an action packed short film centering around Adrian Shephard and a band of resistance fighters struggling to get out a warning about the impending invasion.
- Independent short film - 2 years in the making - Endless hours of post
- 1 Canon HV20
- 7 Friends
- $1,200 budget for the full short film. (beyondblackmesa.com, via riplakoidase. also, eat their facebook page here)
lazy teenage superheroes: way better than skins us s01e01 (from 300 bucks)
Lazy Teenage Superheroes is an extremely funny, extremely well-executed 13-minute rude little superhero movie, made by Michael Ashton for a mere $300. It's full of cussin', lewd speculative scenarios involving the private lives of slacker teen supes who are mostly interested in using their powers to get loaded and/or laid. And there's ninjas and herpes jokes. (via boingboing)