If barely legal girls wired into some VR mainframe security hardlines had their own fashion niche, P.A.S.S. with her Christmas morning smile would be their idol. However, she ends up as a chibi tamagotchi for cyberpunk otakus with rooms not much bigger than claustrophy-rich dorm toilets lined up with shelves of manga, tinted with colors of scattered Skittles and bukkake beige.

N.U.D.E.@’s been the sleeping hit for 2003 and apart from Gamespot, a few minor sites (such as The Armchair Empire) and a FAQ compiled by a few dedicated players, nobody remembers it anymore, the game sinking with the original XBOX platform, us in despair. But still, if you had your own Japanese-speaking gal who would gladly operate your laptop and sing sad birthday songs to you, would you care?

Go watch Condition:Human instead.